often I am in awe of the little people I take care of....

the most amazing thing happened today when I was outside in the backyard with the "Littles".  That's what I call my little group of preschool kids ranging between two and four years old.  It's been so warm lately that I've started bringing the tub of sandbox toys out of the shed so children can scoop, push and mix the snow.  Four children, Everett, Joe, Blake and Harper were sledding and three children needed to get busy with an activity, so out came the sandbox tub of dump trucks, tea party supplies, scoops and shovels.  Winston and Sam pounced on the tub and emptied it pretty quickly, looking for the prized dump trucks and shovels that always fall to the bottom of the tub.  In their haste they took our outside baby doll and flung it into the snow.  The doll landed facedown away from the tub on the hillside.  It was partially buried in the snow...  Everett and Harper were sledding together, and working hard at carrying the sled back up the hill.  They hadn't seen me take the tub out of the shed, hadn't seen me place it in the snow, hadn't seen Sam and Winston empty the tub and certainly hadn't seen our poor baby doll abandoned and forgotten half buried face down in the snow.  Everett was in the lead, carrying the front part of their sled with Harper bringing up the rear.  When they crested the sledding hill "upside" and brought the sled across into the "downside" starting position Everett spied the baby, facedown and buried in the snow.  Immediately he dropped the sled and ran over to the doll.  Gingerly he picked her up in his arm, turned her over and wiped the snow from her face.  And then, this amazing thing happened.  He performed CPR on the baby.  perfectly.  intently. calmly and clearly.   He positioned the baby exactly how you are supposed to hold babies while you perform CPR on them.  He covered the baby's nose and mouth with his and gave a few quick breaths.  He turned his head and listened, with his ear pressed against her chest.  He repositioned the baby and gave a few more breaths, covering her nose and mouth with his mouth and taking big breaths to breath into her.  After a few breaths he turned his head again and listened.  He put his mittened hand on the baby's chest and pushed down a few times and then repositioned the baby and gave more breaths.  After performing more CPR for a few more minutes, with both chest compressions and breathing, apparently the baby recovered because Everett visibly relaxed, smiled, wiped the rest of the snow from the baby's face and body, gave her a hug and carried her back to sled, which, during this time, Harper had positioned and was sitting in it patiently waiting for him.  Without saying a word, he handed the baby to Harper, climbed in behind her and off they slid down the hill.  Nothing was said during this time, Everett didn't talk and I didn't interrupt him, filling his space with my words.  I just watched, from the background.  And in awe.  And, yes, Everett's parents are in the paramedic field and he is exposed to CPR and other lifesaving/healthcare techniques.  But, really, it was the most impressive display of correct CPR procedure on an infant that I have ever seen.  WOW.

Steamboat Springs Winter Sports Club memories

For the 100^th anniversary of the Winter Sports Club and lead up to the Olympics  the Steamboat Pilot/Today is going to run stories on 50 past and present athletes and we’d like for you to answer the following questions:

1. Name, age   Tracy DelliQuadri, 44
2. When were you in the Club and what discipline?       In the beginning, we practiced all disciplines.  We all cross-country skied, jumped and alpine skied.  Latter I veered towards Alpine Skiing, I especially loved downhill ski racing.  I was in the Winter Sports Club from birth it seems, until 1987 and then again as a parent recently.
3. Who were your friends in the club?      Well, we were all so close in the 70's and 80's.  I was a part of a huge family that included the Crimmins girls (Mercedes, Laura and Libby), the Clapsaddles (Kelly and Casey), the Bordens (Christy and Scott), the Cowmans (Liz and Scott), the Graves, the Watsons (Keith and Scott), the Webers (Connie and John), the Bowes (Heidi and Tammy), the Sandvicks, the Dunhams, the McCoys, the Magills, the Rawlings boys, the Uberagas, the Stoughtons, the Wards....  In my immediate age group I skiied with Christy Borden, Kelly Clapsaddle, Anne Kakela, Hillary Heid, Tyler Williams, Scott Watson, Libby Crimmins, Scott Cowman, Scott Stoughton, Matt Graves, Craig Thrasher, Matt Grosjean,Katie Holloran,  Wendi Dunham, Pirkko Radabaugh, Chloe McKay and so many others.  There were friends made from other clubs that I still keep in touch with.  I also was greatly impacted by my coaches through the years: Walt Evans, Roy Powell, Ken Brenner, Rick Poulin, Teresa DeSilva, Marti Irish, Chris Moltin,  Ames Chandler and John Leffler.  One of the greatest influences were the older, elite skiers whom I chased around the mountain and tried to keep up with: Troy Watts, Jack Miller, John Weber, Heidi Bowes, Olin Armstrong, my brother (Terry DelliQuadri).  There was never a lack of older, really good skiers that would always be willing to share their passion with you.
4. What is your favorite Club memory?  Without a doubt it was the entire Winter Carnival weekend.  The weekend started with the Soda Pop slalom (where a can of soda was the anticipated prize), continued through the street events downtown (who doesn't love hurling yourself down a snow-covered street on skis holding onto a galloping horse and trying to catch rings on a stick, ski around a cone slalom or go over a jump?), the parent child downhill (tucking down the entire mile run produced exceptionally strong legs), the obstacle course that consisted of ladders, straw bales, tires and whatnot that you would have to maneuver around with a throng of other racers, the parade and it's events and ending with the grand finale of the night show.  There is nothing more thrilling than skiing down the face of Howelsen Hill, or going off the 70 or 90m jumps, wearing old ski clothes and holding onto two lit flares at night.  What an enormous thrill when you are a child!  Most of my childhood memories involve the Winter Sports Club, as it was my home growing up.  I think I spent more time on Howelsen Hill than I did in my own house.  I also loved it when the team stayed at my grandmother's (Granny's) house in Carbondale and at Barbara's Peak Nine Restaurant at the top of Peak Nine in Breckenridge.  
5. What are you doing now?  I own and operate Little Bear Child Care right here in Steamboat Springs.  I'm the mom to two great kids, whom I love to ski with.  
6. What impact did the Club have on you? The Winter Sports Club taught me to be confident, strong and independent.  It gave me a love of being in the outdoors.  It taught me how to be reliable, dependable and how to work towards my goals.  Ski racing taught me how to manage money, travel the world and have a strong work ethic.  Ski racing taught my how to realistically analyze my own job performance and not compare it to those around me.  It also taught me that the final result is not nearly as important as the effort put in to getting there.
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   

wrapping paper

It's been over a year now that Barbara passed away.  The littlest things make memories of her or Granny pop into my head.  Today is my sister's birthday.  I was wrapping a gift for her, the Whole Foods Market Cookbook (yum), and Adi found a roll of festive wrapping paper to use.  Instantly it reminded me of Barbara.  After she had passed away, we were going through her things and emptying her house and there were many items that I grabbed, I just couldn't see throwing them away.  I grabbed her large collection of wrapping paper.  Barbara had a box full of brightly colored wrapping paper for every possible occasion

Adi the sugar plum fairy and Barbara

Theo helping Barbara rake

.  As I sat wrapping the gift for my sister, I reflected on the personality of the person who bought the paper, who had such a stock of wrapping paper in her garage so she would be prepared to give a gift for any occasion.  Who had definite ideas about what was proper, and giving a gift that wasn't wrapped was most likely not proper in Barbara's proper English upbringing.  A small gift, this wrapping paper.  To remind me of such a loving soul who touched my life..... thinking of Barbara tonight.

Little Girl Wishes

When I was a little girl I loved reading the books written by Jill Krementz.  There was A Very Young Rider, which was my favorite.  But there was also A Very Young Circus Flyer, A Very Young Gymnast, A Very Young Ice Skater and A Very Young Dancer.  It was reading A Very Young Dancer that opened my eyes to the story of The Nutcracker.  And I have always loved it.  The holiday classic story of a little girl, Clara, who recieves a toy Nutcracker as a gift enchanted me.  I found the music at the library and listened to it.  I made up my own dances to it, watched videotaped productions of it on PBS, read books about the Nutcracker and have just fallen in love with the story. One of my lifelong dreams is to go to New York City during the holiday season to see The Nutcracker.  And, to experience New York during the holidays.  Ice Skating under that huge tree in Rockefeller Center, taking in a play or musical (like The Christmas Carol), eating sundays at Serendipity,  The grand finale to the weekend would be going to see the New York City Ballet's production of The Nutcracker. Yep, it's been a lifelong dream of mine.  Buuuut, things being what they are, I've never been. Actually I've never REALLY been to New York City (not including airports and that one weekend in 1977 when lightening hit and there was the great blackout.  I was supposed to go into the city with my Grandma on that day but we ended up not going, because of the Blackout.)     Actually I've never seen a real production of any Nutcracker either.  That is until a few years ago when a local dance collective started to produce it yearly.  So, for the past few years we've gone to the local production of the Nutcracker and have simply loved it, even Theo loves it and looks forward to watching it.  We've all been enchanted with the show and consider it a beloved holiday tradition now.  I toyed with the idea of going to Denver to see the Nutcracker, or even Aspen.  But I couldn't afford the tickets.  So, we go see the local production of The Nutcracker which is remarkably good..  And fun.  And Adi likes getting dressed up.  And it's part of our holiday tradition now...  maybe someday I'll get my dream vacation to New York City.  But until then, we love our local show.

Adi all dressed up and ready to watch The Nutcracker

Happy 90th Birthday Granny. I miss you.

 Happy 90th Birthday Granny

I think about you often and strive to continue your spirit in the way that I live my life.  

with a love for adventure,,

your great ability to connect with almost anybody and welcome them into your home.

your passion for the Colorado mountains, for gardening and for feeding your hummies.

I miss hearing your stories of your childhood... beloved memories.

I miss your words of wisdom and your much needed kicks in the arse.

You would have been 90 today.  I think I'll go ski a "Green Granny Slope" in your honor.

Is It Enough?

When I think back to my own childhood, it is full of good memories.  Of being busy.  Of being outdoors and free.  I loved growing up in the Winter Sports Club.  There was surety and safety in the daily routine of walking over to Howelsen Hill after school and skiing until dinner time.  I even walked home after ski practice.  I don't remember having any homework in elementary school.  And there weren't any other activity options out there, for my family anyway.  Skiing is what most of us kids did.  And I loved it.  By the age of 10, I was traveling for ski races, had been in several ski races and loved skiing in general.  When there wasn't any snow, my time was pretty unstructured.  I remember riding my bike to the pool to swim (alone) from an early age.  Riding my horse, alone, in the mountains on trail rides daily.  Playing with my sister and friends, tagging along after my brother, being passionate about horses and figuring out ways to ride them.    When we (my siblings and I) were each 7, my grandmother (Granny) took us each on a huge trip "back east" to visit "the relatives".  My trip lasted the entire summer.  I left the week after school got out, and didn't return until the week before school started.  It was a loooong time to be away from my immediate family, house, bed.... but it was so totally worth it.  It was a great childhood, one that I would wish for any child.  And then I think about my own children's lives and I wonder and worry.  Is it enough?  Do they have enough activities?  Do they have enough unstructured time?  Structured time?  Are they passionate about anything?  Do they have good memories?  Do they have a foundation that will carry them through into adulthood.  Will they find passion in their lives and have I helped contribute?  Have I been too much of a pushover? Have I let them quit too many times?  Have I let them try too many activities and allowed them to move on rather than to be the best in one thing/sport?  Do they have good memories?  Should they have more chores?  Should allowances be handled differently?  Should be travel more?  See more of the world?  Do I place enough emphasis on schoolwork, or not enough.  Or... whatever.  Are they kind?  Compassionate?  Do they stick up for the underdog?  Have I created good memories for them?  Have I supported their friendships?  Do we use electronics too much?  Do we have enough special family time?  Do they get enough one on one attention?  Are they spoiled?  Should they be helping out more around the house?  Should they be cooking more?  Do we have fun and act silly enough?  Do we get out into nature enough?  We should have gone on a backpacking trip last summer!  How can I show them the world? I think a benefit of having a child rearing partner is that you can bounce all of these worries off of someone else who intimately knows your children, and you, and be supported and uplifted when the worries seem to outweigh everything else.  I'd like someone who loves me to tell me I'm doing a good job.  And really mean it, not just to make me feel better.  I worry about college scholarships, having too much free time in high school and getting into trouble, Not finding passion, Not getting good grades.  Not going to college.  Not being happy.  Not loving who they are..  Not supporting each other and being there for each other.  I worry that I don't open the right lines of communication with my kids.  Do I listen enough?  Do I ask the right questions?  Do I give too many answers when they should be figuring it out for themselves?  Do I intervene too much, and take sides too often?  Are my kids too violent?  Too argumentative and difficult?  Any why does my lovely daughter go to the nurse every day at school?  What is she not getting that she needs!  From me!  I don't know.  Tonight while heading down to Boys and Girls Club to pick up my kids I was thinking to myself, "Is it enough?"  I just don't know.  Mostly I'm just bone achingly tired.  And I'd like a night off of worrying.

The Big Switcheroo....

I switched doctors the other day, a decision that kept me up nights riddled with anxiety for months now.  My previous doctor I began seeing out of convenience mostly.  I liked the fact that it was a small practice and I knew two out of the three doctors personally.  And some of the nurses too.  I liked the uncrowded parking lot and the flexibility with scheduling.  But, really, my health was getting in the way.  I want to lose weight.  I mean I REALLY want to lose weight.  A lot of it.  And I've struggled with this problem for YEARS.  And my doctors.... they weren't helpful.  really.  The told me to exercise more.  To make more time for me.  They said they knew me, they know I'm active... they see me out on the same trails they are on.  They told me to ride my bike and to get out more.  They recommended that I track my exercise and eating with an online program. They prescribed me protein shakes and told me it would be easy.  Simple. Which made me feel like a complete failure when I couldn't do it.  I could not do it.  And somehow that ties into the same feelings of failure when my ski coaches got so mad at me when I quit ski racing way back when.  I failed.  Again.
I'm not sure they really heard me when I said I was bone achingly exhausted all of the time.  SO TIRED.  And yes, I chalk it up to being a single mom, and working all day with lots of small children.  But, I'm still so tired. I shouldn't be this tired.  I started tracking my heart rate with a monitor.  When I noticed that my heart rate was ridiculously low (32 beats a minute when I woke in the morning) they did bloodwork, discovered I had some thyroid problems and prescribed some pills.  And then it kindof fell apart.  To save money I started doing my blood draws through the VNA.  (Blood Draws are recommended every six weeks or so, it's SO expensive!)  And then the information didn't always get sent back to the right spot.  And then I started doing my yearly wellness exams with the VNA because, well, it's more affordable.  And the information didn't always get transferred over to the correct place.  And it's hard to work with thyroid prescriptions without reliable bloodwork information.  Yes, I get that.  Buuuuuut, it still ties into this weight that I have to lose.  And I'm not.  And I'm beginning to panic about it.  And, I need consistent affordable care.  So, I switched to the wellness clinic at the VNA (Visiting Nurses Association) and just had my first visit over there.  I didn't sleep the night before, tossing and turning with anxiety.  I was so nervous they had to take my blood pressure three times before I calmed down enough to have an accurate read.  And they helped me come up with a plan of action.  And they didn't tell me it was going to be easy.  And they didn't tell me to just get out more (no duh).  And they told me to take it in small steps, one goal at a time. And they scheduled another appointment for next week, to make another goal.  And I am so very hopeful.  I left with such a feeling of relief and support, rather than feeling like I'm a pathetic loser who is failing,  again.  I feel like the plan of action is realistic and doable.  And it doesn't involve drinking protein shakes for two meals a day.
And I am so glad to have switched clinics.  I can't believe I had so much anxiety about it.  Silly me...